Stop Saying You’re Not Good Enough!
Yesterday while in the middle of my yoga practice, I noticed an old voice haranguing me.
I’d been feeling just a touch under the weather…nothing serious but a tiny bit of achiness in my throat and some fatigue. A common symptom for me that is not that common anymore in this era of face masks in public!
Plus, I’d had dental surgery the day before, so my body was definitely in need of a bit more rest than usual.
But – this body was also crying out for some movement, so I chose a gentle yoga routine that I’ve used before when I was a little sick.
However, in the last couple of years I’ve become way more devoted to yoga as a movement routine and I tend to like the more vigorous vinyasa practices… so I feel like I’m getting more of a workout.
So – that little voice in my head was saying, ‘this isn’t enough. You should be pushing yourself more. You need more of a workout than this.”
Luckily (this time) I was able to ignore the yammering voice and listen to my greater wisdom… which KNEW that a kinder, gentler practice was exactly what my body needed right now.
Unfortunately, I’m not always so successful in turning down the volume on that voice.
The ‘not enough’ refrain shows up like one of those old advertising or sitcom jingles that became lodged in your brain when you were a kid. (This is the tale of some castaways…. Am I dating myself?)
Those old songs can be annoying, but the ‘not enough’ jingle is way worse!
I don’t have enough time
There’s not enough money
I’m not exercising enough
I’m not trying hard enough
I haven’t done enough
And on and on and on and on and on
And don’t even get me started on the ‘Should’ refrain. That’s another tale for another day.
Most of us picked up on the ‘not enough’ story at a very young age. For example, well-meaning adults might have told you you’re not trying hard enough.
They don’t even have to use the words ‘not enough’ … the implication is there.
Here’s what I want to tell you today.
You ARE enough. You always were.
You came here to the planet 100% worthy and perfect exactly as you are, and there’s nothing you can do or not do to change that.
There’s no amount of exercise, or managing your food, or volunteering, or creating, or earning, or productivity hacking that will ever make you any more worthy than you already are right now in this red hot instant.
And all those voices in your head that tell you different?
They are coming from the conditioning of a patriarchal, white supremacist society. A society that values money and productivity over all else. A society that has shown us all that we are supposed to look a certain way to be accepted.
This is not a collective that values the messy, flawed and yet brilliant perfection of the ordinary individual.
And, I believe it’s slowly changing – for the better. Changing in favor of the crazy, coloring out of the lines and in favor of acceptance of ALL people no matter how they look, how they worship, or where they are on the economic spectrum.
But it’s a slow process.
Meanwhile, it’s up to US to remember that the ‘not enough’ jingle is just a piece of bullshit that got installed in our brains and has been taking up too much space for way too long.
Check in with how you feel when you are thinking ‘not enough’… in whatever version(s) it shows up for you.
One of the patriarchal myths behind the ‘not enough’ story is that if we don’t believe it, then we will never strive for our goals or to create and improve ourselves or the world.
That’s yet another lie!
We are wired to look for more. As humans we will always be reaching, we will always be creating.
We can strive and create from a feeling of anxiety, inadequacy, and doubt. Or we can create what we want in our own lives and on the planet from a sense of confidence and sufficiency.
Which way would you rather go?
What is one small way you can decide you are doing enough today? That you HAVE enough? That you ARE enough?
I help brilliant women like you drop excess weight. This might be about shedding actual pounds and kilos on your body (with The Menopausal Weight Release Solution), or it might be releasing the more subtle (and heavier!) weight of never feeling good enough.