A Different Take On Weight Loss

Do you wake up every morning wondering how you will possibly manage shrink down your menopausal belly… and then feel sort of guilty for obsessing about something so ‘shallow’?

After all you’re an actualized woman. Intellectually you get it that the size of your body should not equate to your sense of self worth.

But – that intellectual knowing has not made it down into your bones.

Somehow that old litany is constantly popping up in your head. Every time you pass a mirror. Every time you open your closet and try to decide what to wear. Every time you slip into a shirt and realize it feels a bit tighter. Every time you wonder if and unpleasant physical symptom is caused by excess weight

Those voices in your head telling you you need to lose weight. That something’s wrong and must be fixed.

And then the helpless feeling, because it all feels so impossible.

If this is you, I totally get it. I’ve been right where you are. And it sucks

And sometimes I still fall into the thought error that it’s somehow less profound or meaningful to coach women who want to lose menopausal weight.  Shouldn’t I be focusing on saving the world instead?

Or at the very least helping people learn to get along better?

And then I remember the truth… Or, should I say the truths.

Truth #1: It’s Not Either/Or

It’s all too easy to get caught up in either/or thinking when it comes to the topic of how you regard your body. It’s EITHER you want to lose some weight (make a change in your body) which means you don’t love yourself and your body. OR, you love your body just the way it is, which means it’s wrong to want to lose weight or change your body in any way.

This is actually another huge thought error! Either/Or thinking never serves any of us. It keeps us from finding solutions and from true growth.

What is if the topic of weight loss and body love is actually Both/And?

I believe it is. In fact I know it is, because all or nothing is never the way things work.

What I know to be true is that you can BOTH love your body the way it is AND see the value you’d receive from losing some extra weight.

In fact the most successful weight loss always comes from a place of self acceptance and love.

You can actually make choices that nurture and fuel this precious vessel we call a body, WHILE loving it and yourself hard enough so that this doesn’t feel like some horrible sacrifice on the altar of being beautiful enough or being accepted by others.

Truth #2:  Everything is Everything AKA One Goal Achieved Equals More Goals Achieved

For many of us weight loss becomes THE big obstacle, the one thing that we can’t seem to ‘fix’ in ourselves. It becomes the thing that we can’t stop thinking about and that we blame our weight for most of our unhappiness.

If only I were thin, then I’d enjoy socializing more.
If only I were thin, then I could wear cute clothes.
There’s no way I would get naked in front of anybody with this body, much less a bathing suit.
This menopausal weight makes me feel so much older.

All of that is simply thoughts. Sentences that show up in your mind.

Not one of those sentences carries any universal truth. And yet, if you think one or more of those sentences (or any of their many relatives), you find yourself feeling unhappy, defeated, helpless, ashamed – or any number of  ‘negative’  feelings.

That’s because it’s the thoughts we believe that create the emotions we feel. It’s not our actual weight or clothing size. It’s only our thoughts about that circumstance.

When you decide to release weight by dealing with these root causes of your excess weight, you begin to understand this on a deep and visceral level.

And – not only do you release weight if that’s what’s best for your body – but you realize that you now have the basic building blocks for tackling any other obstacle or goal in your life.

It’s an amazingly empowering realization!

And after that, the sky’s the limit when it comes to moving forward toward your dreams.


One reason that we sometimes see ‘weight loss’ as a shallow desire is because it’s so associated with women trying to fit into an acceptable shape that they believe society demands of them.

So many women have unrealistic perceptions of their own bodies – seeing them as fat and ugly, when in fact they are shapely and beautiful in the eyes of most others. Others believe that because they are overweight they unloved and have no value in the world.

These misperceptions are gleefully fed by our media and advertising machines.

Once you understand how these industries are trying to manipulate your brain, it is tempting to just shut off any true desires to improve your care of your own body through healthier practices that could result in a weight that feels better on your frame.

It’s also just as possible that you just think you need or want to lose weight because that societal filter has not yet been quite lifted from your vision of yourself.

Whatever your reasons for wanting to release that extra menopausal weight  – when you embark on a journey to lose weight from Inside Out, your self awareness grows as does your ability to truly love and appreciate your own beautiful self.

And that is when the magic happens in so many other areas of your life.



If you’re resonating with this, I invite you to join the Sisterhood over at my Facebook Group, Ageless Radiance: Fearless, Fit & Flourishing After Forty.

And –  if you’re motivated to end your own obsessive all or nothing about weight thinking once and for all, we should talk.

Here, is where you can book a free Body Breakthrough Call with me. In about 45 minutes we’ll uncover three things that might be holding you back from your personal body goals, and at least one thing you can do right away to turn that around.




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